6 steps to deal with annoying people…….
“open your eyes, look within. Are satisfied with the life you’re living?” Bob Marley
Annoying, inconsiderate, manipulative, tiresome , self-centred, “a real **#?!!”….you know the kind of person I’m talking about. A lot of us have these kind of people in our lives and they just manage to “make” us angry or frustrated , sometimes simply by being themselves. I’m sure it won’t take long for you to think of someone who has “caused” your blood to boil in the past. So what do we do about these awful people?
The first step before planning your revenge is to make sure you have considered the following: every conflict in your life with others is ,on some level, a reflection of a conflict you have within yourself. Perhaps if you address your internal conflict the external one will be quicker to solve?
Check out this great little tool taken from Will Schutz’s work. Just fill in the gaps and be honest!
- Imagine you are talking to the person…..
- “You are……” ( describe them how you genuinely want to)
- “Because you …..” (what specifically are they doing to deserve the previous statement)
- “Towards you I feel….” ( what is it you feel? If you think this a “touchy-feely/weak question then you really need to to this step!)
- “I Imagine that you think I am…..” ( what do you think they are thinking about you?)
- “I’m afraid that I am….” ( USE the words that you wrote to finish the previous sentence in step 5 to finish this sentence . Now use the insight to take any appropriate responsibility for your part in the conflict before you move to resolve it)